Do you know the piano's on my foot ?

This afternoon when I got back from Tauranga, I was sent out in the old Ford, the one with half a broom stick stuck in a meat grinder for a gear box with three deliveries requiring a fork lift for delivery. Daniel followed me on the forkhoist as we went round delivering to unload. I have known Daniel since he was a very angry 8 year old, now I work with him... How time flys. Anyway, one of the deliveries was to a new shop in town called "Sun & Moon" The recipient was a very voluble little Asian in a white hat. After I got home, I got changed & herself & me went out for tea to our favourite restaurant, De Luca's. After the usual beautiful meal, we still had enough room for dessert, so I had this..... Chocolate Fettucine with raspberrys & cream.


Now, I'm not saying that I would actually commit murder for this dessert. Grievous bodily harm, certainly, & perjury , yes, & probably a couple of other "Thou shalt nots"as well. Damn, but it was nice. Well, after that we went for a wander & happened to walk past the Sun & Moon, so I regaled herself with the story of the Piano in full 3 part harmony & the 8X10 colour glossy photographs, while we peered through the window at a wonderland of Oriental treasure, the center piece in the window being an exquisitely crafted wooden bath for two.

As we stood & gazed, the said little Oriental came & opened the front door & invited us in for a preview. Gone was the voluble & excited little man that received his daughters piano that afternoon. Instead we were treated to an amazing lesson in history & philosophy & religion by a gentle, earnest Taiwanese Gentleman. The pieces he has on show are exquisite. A lot of them are copied from artifacts on display at the Taipei National Museum. This place, something that I already knew, has an absolutely priceless collection removed from Mainland China in the face of the ravening hordes of Communism. The furniture that he has for sale is the sort of furniture that just invites you to run your hand over it & he is more than happy to let you do so. There is even an area at the back with a comfortable lounge suite where you can sit quietly & wonder what to buy while he makes & serves you tea. Not that we were invited to buy. "You can come in and look, but not for sale till next Thursday."

He has moved down here from Half Moon Bay in Auckland. "Why have half a moon up there when you can have the full one down here?" His name translates to James Sun & Moon, a name implying a bright personality, which he certainly is. I learned a lot tonight about things like the different incarnations of Buddha & the different 'isms in Chinese religion. I learned that he was familiar with the analogy of the blind men & the elephant.. Here if you don't know about it.. We had a wonderful time, interrupted only by our daughter ,who is in the throes of buying a house, ringing Herself on the mobile wanting to know, "Where the bloody hell are you ?" Jeesh, anyone would think we weren't allowed out without a keeper.

Anyway, we had a lovely evening all told, which hopefully will segue (isn't that a neat word) once again here into a great weekend. The haul out winch is repaired on my boat trailer, the scallops & the snapper are in the water waiting & we are ready to rock. Now is time to retire & digest, both physically & spiritually I think. Both body & soul have been well nurtured tonight.. Bless you all....

On a Clear Day....

This is the view from the deck of my truck at a building site I was at today. The little bump that you see on the horizon is Mt Maunganui. At the other end of the vista, you can see Mayor Island. It is absolutely stunning. No wonder someone wants to live there, but what a bastard of a place to take an 8 wheel 11.25 tonne truck. Its 8.5 km off the main road heading towards the Kaimai Ranges from a little township called Aongatete, whose main claim to fame is a massive Kiwi Fruit packing complex. About half the road is a metal surface, & the final track up to the building site is first gear material with about 20cm clearance either side & a sloping paddock to turn round in. Its lucky that my truck has a 4 wheel drive option for the two rear axles. I needed it to get in & out of there.

My Back Pages

As you are probably aware by now, I turned 57 last weekend. Not a particularly significant milestone as far as birthdays go but still. If the Gummint hadn't moved the finish line, I would only be three years away from retirement. As it is , I'm still 8 away... (sigh) I don't actually feel old. I don't feel wise as I thought that I would. I still sort of feel like a little boy lost still . I have always felt the need of an older sibling that I can refer & defer to. Ok, I have my big sister, but she is mentally disadvantaged, and my Mum has totally lost the plot with senile dementia. I don't even go see her as much as I should these days because it fucking well hurts too much.

I don't think my life is a waste or a failure though. In my years, I have seen & done an awful lot of things, & my birthday has occasioned me to ponder on some of them. I think that there are some pretty cool things in there, & some sad ones too & I would like to share a few of them with you.

As a teenager, I played in a band, & later when I discovered folk music I used to play solo at a local coffee club. Music wise, I have been professionally recorded & played on our local radio station. OK, it was only a commercial promoting one end of town, but still... I also recorded the same bit of music for a TV programme about Thames, but it couldn't be included due to copyright problems. I have however been on TV in a different show though. I have also met & talked to Peter Paul & Mary.

I gave sixteen years of my life to the New Zealand Fire Service in various parts of the country. I have run a wheeled escape, (the ladder on the back of this Fire Engine) through the streets of Gisborne & set it up as part of the crew to actually use at a major fire.


I have also used this Godawful piece of kit at an actual fire. If you are sufficiently interested, check it out on Wikipedia here. They were originally designed as a mines rescue set. There are a lot of things I have done while in the Fire Service. Some of the things I have seen aren't particularly pretty & I prefer not to mention them. I'd much rather remember the good times & the practical jokes.. We used to put a lady's purse out front of City Station on a fishing line Friday nights, wait for someone to go pick it up, then yank the cord.. Kept us amused for hours that did.

I went down to help clean up after the earthquake at Edgecombe. That was scary & bloody hard work. I have held too many people while they died in shattered cars, but on the plus side, I have seen both my sons born, & heard their first breath & their first cry. That would have to be one of the most profound experiences of my life.

I have experienced a marriage of 14 years & two sons go down the tubes, & experienced the grief & pain that so many of my generation have. I have experienced the wonderment of finding someone new in my life at a time when I wasn't even looking, & knowing that this person, (herself) was without a doubt the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. This holds true still after some 20 years together. Then there is the bitter sweet learning curve that comes from recycled familys. The person that can come up with a formula for successful step parenting is on a winning streak. Out of it all, I have ended up with two sons that I manage a razors edge sort of a relationship with, a wonderful stepdaughter & two stepsons, & two gloriously wonderful grand children, (So far) that we both just absolutely adore.

I know that I have a lot more life to enjoy, but I still find it a little bit scary when younger ones that I work with defer to me as "older" I don't feel so. My body tells me the other side though. It takes a lot longer in the mornings now for different parts of me to settle into place & accept that we are all vertical & on the move. I'm not too proud to ask for help to do things any more. A sore back for a few days sure strips a body of any pride that you may have.

Anyway, I don't care. I am happy with who & what I am, even if there has been the odd wobbly wheel in the system. I have friends, I have family, I have a roof over my head & good food in my tummy & most of all I have the love of a good woman. Take care out there OK ?

Demanding with menaces

This is Thomas, who condescends to allow Tish & family to live in his house, & barely suffers Nushie's presence. I am currently doing the Tauranga run so am able to slide on in & have lunch with Tish most days. Normally , one doesn't see Thomas at all. Today however, he slid on in the ranchslider while I was there, noticed the fact that I was eating, jumped up on my knee & demanded to share my sandwich. So enthusiastic was he, that he didnt even realise that the first tasty morsel that he gulped down was actually a bit of gherkin...


This is Nushie who follows the principle of , "They also serve who only stand & wait." Or is it that they also GET served... I dunno..... This pic is a touch out of date , cos Nushie now sports a rather fetching red collar..

We're going !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Herself an Tish snuck round behind my back, even had me unwittingly transport the tickets up from Tauranga... Bless they's little cotton socks....

4 rows from the freakin stage we is goin....WOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Jeff Wayne will be conducting The 10-piece Black Smoke Band and a 40-piece String Orchestra. Moody Blues’ Justin Hayward returns to reprise his role as The Sung Thoughts of The Journalist. The show also features Guest Artistes Shannon Noll (MTV’s ‘Best Male Artist’ for a third year in a row) playing Parson Nathaniel, Rachael Beck as Beth, Parson Nathaniel’s wife, and We Will Rock You’s Michael Falzon portraying The Artilleryman. Manfred Mann Earth Band’s Chris Thompson will be returning on stage as The Voice of Humanity.

UK fans and media alike were astounded by the groundbreaking technology featured in the 2006 production, but the 2007 show (which will Tour not only Australia and New Zealand but also the UK this year) will be even bigger and better! World First 3D Holography will be unveiled as Richard Burton appears in sight and sound as George Herbert, The Journalist in the form of a 3 metre high 3D photo-real Hologram.

Other impressive ingredients will include a 3 tonne, 10 meter-high Martian Fighting Machine firing Heat Rays at the audience and scanning them with its bug-like eyes and a 30-meter wide screen projecting CGI-animation throughout the entire show. Surround Sound and other special effects will heighten the audience’s experience even more.

Well thats what the blurb said.. Quite an exciting prospect. Its the weekend after the Steely Dan concert which we also going to & right at the start of my holidays.. I think I'll need em to recuperate. Had a lovely weekend I did.. herself & I went fishing on Saturday. Although it cut up a bit rough, we came home with 10 nice snapper. This is herself with the best one. It tipped the scales at just on 5 lbs. Pretty damn good for this early in the season.
Thats the other love in my life behind Herself. My Haines 1550 called Top Dog. I think its going to be just as lucky as our faithful old Cool Change, that served us so faithfully over the years. This is whats happening at Alf's old place out the front. Amazing to think that they can cut a house in half & shift it from one spot to another. The drivers have my admiration. takes a modicum of talent to line something that big up so accurately on its pilings..






Tish & the rugrats came up from Tauranga today to poke the shit at me because I was another year older... Seriously, it was lovely to see them & Tish & Ads between them turned out a wonderful Birthday cake, even if she did stuff the numeral candles up & have them reading 75 instead of 57.. At this point, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt on it. Guys, I really appreciate the effort. Knowing that H had her Ball last night & the effort you put into that, the early start this morning was a big ask & I love you all dearly for it. We had a blast. As usual, Tish brought some extra hardware to shoehorn into my puter box & I now think I have enough computer power to take over some smaller 3rd world countries.. Cant be a lot of room left in there now. Anyway the beast is running super fast an slicker n greased weasel crap now, so thanks a heap. Lovely to see ya all up here.. (Sigh...) back to the real world in the morning I guess..

Curiosity nearly killed the cat.

Today we went to Auckland instead of going fishing. Pretty poor choice I know, but we had a fuel tank to collect from a very nice lady in Howick & herself's brother only lives 10 minutes away from where we had to collect the tank from & he was flying out to San Fransisco this afternoon, (Thats what he does for a living) & we hadn't seen him in ages, soooooo.......

We had a lovely lunch with John & his lovely wife & Johns newly grown up son & wandered off just after 2.00 to let him have a nap before he strapped on his 777 & disappeared into what passes for a sunset today. So we had an afternoon to kill.. I suggested to herself that we go take a look at this, & much to my surprise she agreed.

Well, God knows that I pride myself on being a fairly worldly wise sort of an individual & curiosity has led me to some strange & wonderful places on the net, but this lot.... I think we were probably nearly the oldest there apart from a rather elderly couple at the bondage & discipline stand. He looked tired & she was dishing out strokes with a cat of about 200 tails to anyone that cared to step up & assume the position. (No I didn't) This beast was about the size of your average wet mop head & took this old girl both hands to swing it. But swing it she could. It landing with a "Whommmpppp" that sounded like a wet telephone book hitting a brick wall at about 80 km/h. Anyway, I digress. I thought the male & female genitalia where relatively straight forward to operate, but damn there is a lot of gear out there to stimulate & tittilate. I nudged herself & pointed to one rather large black implement & muttered as sotto voce as the loud raunchy music would allow, "That would be guaranteed to get your undivided attention. She looked it up & down , muttered ,"Yep" & kept on walking.

I can now say that I have seen a blow up doll. If my only chance of a date was a bird that looked like one of those, I think I would take a vow of celibacy. I mean really.. 3 foot tall with a permanently surprised look on a face with permanently pursed lips, no hands & no feet. Mrs Palmer & her five daughters would have to be a better option.

I am very proud of herself. She took it all in her stride. The jelly wrestling, the permanently screening blue movies, the strip shows, the young lasses wandering round in just barely enough to stay decent.. and that was just the visitors.. She even, bless her, nudged me on several occasions to point out particularly interesting ones that she thought I had missed. She wouldn't let me buy her any red velvet corsets, or plastic nurses outfits though.

But what really got me, was that in one corner of all this lewdity, sinfullness, pornography, & general celebration of human sexuality, huddled together, for mutual protection I guess, was a group of stalls advertising clairevoyancy readings, tarot cards & aura photography.. I mean really.. What are they gonna tell you ? I saw you coming..? Which reminds me of a very old & sad joke. Why do Gypsys have crystal balls ? So you can see them coming.. Later Possums

Yuss, well.....

left click on this to see the full pic

Massage my ego Baby

I have been given a plum new run to develop at work. Everybody says I deserve it. I think I do too. For quite a time I have been the "Go everywhere, do anything Mr Fill in man.. " It has been said that Superman wears pyjama's with my name embroidered on them. Anyway, I'm doing this new run in a different town with new clients. They say a change is as good as a rest, & trust me, it is. I'm really enjoying it & also enjoying regular hours & being home evenings with herself.

Anyway, back to the main issue as the actress said to the bishop. The subject of weekend activities arose at this particular depot I was at, & the lady I was talking to said she was going to a 50th birthday party Saturday night. I assumed my best wistful look & said, "Ah yes, I had one of those a few years ago..." To which she charmingly replied, "Bullshit, you're not that old." Protestations to the contrary failed to sway her, so in the end I had to produce my drivers license to prove my advanced age. What it is to have led such a clean & virtuous life... I like that lady.....

I fondled a Ferrari...

Its true.. There they was pretty as a picture, all still in their protective wrappings. Damn they be awesome looking motor cars... Just HAD to have a wee fondle...

Oh, an happy dead day to Elvis Presley. Yup, its 30 years since old Fatso kicked the bucket.. Still earning his family $60 mil in royalties though...

The Bob Dylan Concert

I know you have all been waiting with bated breath for a review from me, the ultimate Dylan fan, well don't be disappointed. Here it is. I have read various reviews & critiques in sources varying from newspaper reviews to message board junkies. The only really bad comments I have read are from those who went along to relive their golden years expecting Dylan to sing exactly as he did in nineteen humptyseven. Anyone who is a real dedicated Dylanophobe would realize that he never sings a song quite the same. They are his songs, he can do what he damn well likes with them OK?

He didn't disappoint on Saturday. From a kickass start with Rainyday Woman #12 & 35 to the final of All Along The Watchtower, The whole evening rocked. His backing band was superb & Dylan was Dylan. Clad in black , he stood splay legged behind his keyboard & gave it all hell. he isnt that terribly good on keyboard & the volume for it was relatively low. Which was more than could be said for the volume on his microphone. That was too loud & distorted his vocals badly at some points, but hey, it was Dylan & we all knew the words anyway. Highway61 revisited, tangled up in Blue, Rollin an a Tumblin, & herself's personal favourite Masters of War. Quite a lot of stuff from Modern Times, But hey, thats a kickass album too. He even had his oscar in pride of place on one of his amps. It was a no frills gig. Just Dylan, a 5 piece band & the sound gear on stage.. Very basic lighting, no flash screens or other distractions. We got what we all went there to see. Our hero. The man who popularised the thoughts & ideals that we all had but couldn't articulate. The man who right from when he left school wanted to be a singer & did it.

We saw Bob Dylan

The Devil made me do it........

I honestly had no intention whatsoever of posting this picture, but this Satanic little voice whispered in my ear saying, "Do it, do it, do it." So, to quote Their Satanic Majesties, "What can a poor boy do ?"

Aleister Crowley excused his utterly abominable behaviour, sexual deviance & generally abhorrent excesses with the catchall phrase "Do what thou wilt to be the whole of the law." Now you know me, live & let live & believe what you like, but surely one can extract sufficient wisdom & guidance from mainstream religion, & yes I include Witchcraft here without having to make fucking pathetic efforts like this? What next ? The Gay Gospel according to St John ???

The last of one of the greats

I found this clip on Youtube strangely enough when I was looking up some old Muppet Show clips,(Don't ask). Its kinda long at 9 minutes, but well worth watching. Its the last performance ever filmed of Johnny Cash . Its done at the Carter Family Ranch, with all his friends & family round him.. Rest in peace Johnny , you gave us so much

The evil that cats do...

As you should be aware of by now, we are servants to two female ginger cats. herself adores them, I tolerate them & Mr Dog lives in abject terror of them. The smaller of the two, Fattums, is a wonderful little hunter, but suffers from a lack of teeth. Thats what ya get I suppose when you don't floss. She does the hunting, but can't do the ritual dismemberment & compulsory feather spread on the lounge carpet, so she catches the birds, sits outside the back door yowling in that special "I've got a gob full of feathers. Grubs up !" To which Tiggs, the other cat, responds, sits reverently until Fattums has finished the ritual torture & execution, then takes the poor pathetic sodden little corpse in through the cat door & proceeds with the final part of the ritual. So determined is she in this that she bought the same bird inside 4 times, twice recovering it from the front garden where I threw it from the front door, carrying it round the house to the back door & giving me that "I dare you to take it off me again asshole," look. So I did & put it in the wheely bin this time.

We have noticed that Fattums has been having more than her fair share of success with little finches recently. Herself found out why today. You see, we give Mr Dog regular bones to eat. Having been told in no uncertain terms that the hall carpet is NOT the preferred place for canines to masticate, he has settled for just outside the back door. Being the time of year that it is, the little finches & waxeyes come down to pick at the marrow & meat shreds left on these bones.

Herself saw an extremely cunning cat at work. What you do, is sit just inside the cat door, which is in the back door, with your nose just poking discreetly through & quietly wait. Sooner or later a poor starving little unsuspecting Finch will come down for a feed.. BAMMMM. Goodbye Mr Finch. Wicked little bitches that they be....

Well, this time next week we will be seated & anxiously awaiting the arrival on stage of The Frames. As you may recall from an earlier post, they are the opening act for Bob Dylan. I have seen on the Herald web site that there is such a demand for tickets to the Auckland show, that there is another concert booked for a Sunday, two weeks later. At the ticket prices, I think once will be sufficient for me. Rest assured that you will get a comprehensive review after the event..

later

Once in a Blue Moon

Some time ago, herself won first prize in a fund raising raffle at the local hospital where she does volunteer work every Friday afternoon providing moral support, tea & sympathy & various other comforts for patients in the Emergency Department, all in all a worthwhile way to spend time. The prize was a nights accommodation plus dinner & breakfast for two at this fine establishment Hotel du Vin. Unfortunately, due to stuffups & misunderstandings, we missed out. Or so we thought. The lady that organised it all asked how we enjoyed, so herself told her the sad story. "Not good," says she & got in touch with her brother, who is one of the head banana's there & suddenly, it was "Yes Cinderella, you can go to the Ball after all." We had our weekend there this weekend. It was lovely..

This picture was taken from the front deck of our cabin on a rainy Sunday morning. The high wire fenced enclosures aren't, as I initially thought, POW yards for recalcitrant petanque players, I have been reliably informed they are tennis courts.

The evening meal was wonderful. The whole megillah. Silver service, formal dress, collar & tie etc. As we didnt have a flunkie for a group shot you will have to put up with individual shots of us. Herself is the pretty one..























Thats us.. the next one is a general shot of the dining room.. Intimidating innit ? The other shot is herself looking relaxed after some very nice food & a few glasses of wine..




















Speaking of before & after shots check these two out. This is a before & after shot of the dessert sampler for two. I warn tou, the after shot isn't pretty






















Like I said, not a pretty sight. Neither is this next one.. This Herself and me nekkid in the spa pool & well, I'll leave the rest to you imagination....


Now you really didn't think that I was gonna show that do ya? And anyway, who the hell would hold the camera ?

Anyway, we stayed on for lunch on Sunday Along with the live jazz band there. A lovely way to spend a weekend it was.. Glad I didnt have to pay for it though because they charge like wounded scrub bulls. What we gnawed our way through on Saturday night would have cost $280.00 alone. The service though was awesome. And it was nice to be served by someone called Hanne or Yogi instead of the usual Sung Mae, or Egg Fu Yuong. Our every need was well catered for. Even 3 choices of water to have with your meal.

Oh yes, & there really WAS a Blue Moon too... When we walked from our cabin to the restaurant on Saturday night, I happened to look up & the moon had this beautiful blue halo around it. We stood & watched it for about 5 minutes, it was that pretty...

This Weekend, I said goodbye to an old friend

She has been sitting on the lawn casting envious glances at the brazen hussy that has taken her place inside. She of the good looks & smooth ways has supplanted the old girl that has served me faithfully the last 10 years or so. Whilst I am totally enamoured of my new love, it was not without a tinge of regret that I left her sitting in the driveway of her new home.

I know her new man will treat her gently & not expect her to extend her abilities the way I have. He wont put her into situations that really are out of her depth, but still parting has its pangs. I have finally found someone that will love my beloved old "Cool Change" as much as I have. Our trusty old 12" parker Craft has been turned over to an older gentleman that I have worked with over the years. I know he will look after her & doesn't intend to go out very far in her.

Meanwhile roll on settled weather so that we can get out in "Top Dog" Its going to be a good summer this year. Still, it IS rather strange to see that empty patch on the lawn out there .......

Well, there's my weekend stuffed

You just don't realise how much damage a simple thing like weather can cause. Admittedly, the damage at our place was of a fairly minor scale compared to some. A few branches down off trees, the cladding stripped from our chimney & the gardens just absolutely devastated. Fortunately, our beautiful Silver Birch tree at the rear of the house & in the most exposed position, survived magnificently, only losing the tip branches which it does usually do in a gradual process over the winter months. Still, its taken me most of my weekend & a Jumbo bin to clean it up. You have to feel for those who felt the wrath of the weather in a somewhat more intense fashion. AND they have more coming up North as well..

WHEN INTEREST BECOMES OBSESSION

I guess I should be flattered really. Over 12 months ago we had a falling out with an acquaintance over something that I had written in my blog. 12 months or so later, this person is still checking my blog site at least once a day. I guess he is hoping that I'm gonna say something mean about him still.. Well, here you are then.. This should keep you visiting for another 12 months.. At the very least, I thank you for keeping my statistics looking healthy..

Well, thats about me. The poor old body is stiff & sore.. Nap time followed by a soak in the spa with herself...

Sometimes words fail me

Honestly, They really do..................................

I think I'm technophobic or summink

You see' I decided to singlehandedly drag myself kicking & screaming into the 21st century & shout myself an mp3 player. I mean how cool is that ? here's old Flattie, the King of Vinyl, (in the form of records, so lift ya dirty minds) movin on up. Its a neat little gizmo. I've managed to put 4 tracks that I have coaxed & wheedled out of frostwire onto it & can play them.. I also thought that I had downloaded my latest Bob Dylan album to it, but that would seem that I havent. Or at least nowhere in that little beast that I can find... I guess that I'll figure it out eventually. At least I havent got a yodelling cat which is summink I guess...

Not sayin it was cold today

But the term Brass monkeys does spring to mind. The first pic is the stone guard on my truck this morning. (I wasnt driving Ok ?) The second is the towing hook on the front bumper. Guess what the white stuff is?

We stopped at the Waihou Tavern today to collect a pallet full of crates of empty beer bottles. While there I had occasion to "Ease Springs" as it were . This sign was above the urinal in the Mens toilets. Its a shame its not in a few other more prominent places as well....

John Kay, you're an asshole...

Some time back, Radio Hauraki announced that John Kay & Steppenwolf would be touring New Zealand. I was mildly interested I must admit, but decided against investing in tickets for a number of reasons. The Auckland concert was going to be mid week & its a hassle organising time off. The main reason I decided not to eventually was that John Kay was the only original Steppenwolf member to be touring, the rest being what ever session Muso's he could round up at the time. I would have been more interested in going to Crosby Stills & Nash, but for some reason decided not to chase that one either. At least they had a legitimate reason to postpone their tour. Crosby was suffering complications induced by his recent kidney transplant. Thats a fair reason. John Kay didnt give a reason for opting out of his tour, at least that we know of. Nobody in NZ has been able to contact him or his management company to find out. Today, the news has come out that he is due to play a big gig in Canada round about the time he was supposed to be here. Dollars obviously speak louder than loyalty to fans.

Kiwi's unite ! Cash your tickets in. This tired egocentric hasbeen is more interested in money than keeping promises to fans.. John Kay, take your magic carpet & give it to the pusher. I'm certain that he will insert it far enough up your geriatric asshole to be really uncomfortable.. Meanwhile, I'm born to be wild..