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This is a copy of a chain mail letter purportedly originated by him. I think he may have done it originally as an onstage routine...
Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not
forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who
actually believe, if you send them on, a poor six-year-old girl in
Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough
money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a
travelling freak show.
And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give
$1000 to you, and everyone to whom you send 'his' email?
How stupid are we?
Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish,
I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!
What a bunch of bullshit.
Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house
and sodomise me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was
started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget
pilgrim
stowaways on the Endeavour.
Fuck 'em!!
If you're going to forward something, at least send me something
mildly amusing.
I've seen all the 'send this to 10 of your closest friends, and
this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a
nickel from some omniscient being' forwards about 90 times. I don't
fucking care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually
contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our
own
unpopularity.
The point being?
If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you
shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it's funny, send it on.
Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper
in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead
elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per
letter
he'll receive if you forward this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow
morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your
genitals.
Have a nice day.
Billy Connolly
PS Send me 15 bucks and then fuck off.
3 comments:
So what are ya saying, that the leper in Botswana really does have teeth? I've been ripped!
They only a borrowed set... They like the stars. They come out at night...
Oh, community choppers. That explains it all ;-)
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